First of all I proudly served my Country The United States of America for over 20 years and I'm a proud sailor that sailed the seven seas and seen the many nations that loved us and hated us. It was a long and tough road.. The may years and tears at sea and the many years away from family and friends. But you know something , its something I loved and hated at the same time.. The times I loved it ,, out weighed the times I hated it.. I mean those hot months in the Persian Gulf in hot storerooms or on land dealing with the the heat and humidity and lonely days and nights.. Its funny ,, when we are with the guys ,, we have our talks, whether on watch ,, or on liberty call or doing our many working parties.. for those who don't know , working parties is basically working with your shipmates or marines , moving parts , food or materials on a chain .. which is a line of people moving the items up and down a ship or on the pier or on land .. Its hard work , but its fun too, the jokes , the laughs,, the bull shit stores, the exaggerations of life events,, Its all good.. In fact i don't miss the work.. or what I miss the friendships, the camaraderie , the bind we developed.. i know it sounds gay,, but we loved one another ,and we joked and we cried when those times dictated it.. I mean losing shipmates its still the toughest thing to deal with.. In my time I have seen shipmates die, I have seen suicides , drunk driving that led to deaths..Its a harsh life if you let it get to you,, I mean many times i would think why the hell did I join.. I mean being away from family is tough and at times , you grow different ways , because your away from family... If i had to do it over , i think.. maybe,,I would do it different ,,Maybe be more accommodating to family instead of think about career.. Its no wonder spouses hate their husbands at times.because we force our wives to leave good jobs and friends to support us and at times we take our wives for granted.. Yea.. but its how we think we need to do to survive..
But anyways, we deserve the pensions and benefits , because we are placed in harms way on a daily basis.. because of harsh realities of sea life or war.. I mean at any second if bombs weren't detected or what I could of been dead. I'm thankful for those
professionals that were dedicated to protect us from harm. But we did take chances going on liberty in foreign lands where you weren't sure those people liked you or what. I mean at times I thought or felt the hatred from people in Africa , or the Middle east. But because we didn't care , we went on liberty got drunk, acted like fools and did fool's things.. But the time lost at sea is why we deserve out pensions.. because the times we missed birthdays or the times we missed special moments are lost forever.. and to be honest no amount of money can replace those moments,, and now that my boys are grown.. Man I miss those times when they would run to me and hug me and greet me.. Now they just say hi , if not on their phones or computer games.. Its kinda sad to be honest , but that's life..they will grow up and someday be on their own..and as for me.. I want them to do well ,, and I will do my thing which is dive my muscle car and shoot my guns.. Its funny how my car and guns are so valuable to me.. I treasure them.. Because I find them enjoyable.. something my wife doesn't understand ,, but that's ok.. because my happiness comes from my own joy in life,, I no longer need anyone to make me happy. I find happiness in doing what I like to do,, and that's a peace and joy I never had until now.. I know I did my best and served my country with pride and if called upon again I would Gladly partake in protecting America , even though I did my time so to speak.. You have to have patriotism, and pride to serve that many years .. its a feeling like no other to represent this country. I proudly wore my uniform daily and always looked sharp. because i wanted people to know I'm proud to wear the uniform of The United States Navy, From being a deck dog, to being a supply guy to Mailman to Security force ,, I enjoyed every assignment. It brought joy to my heart and eyes , when I led my divisions in all their evolutions.. Yea.. Once you have been through with guys ,, its a bond that last forever.. To shipmates on the USS CAMDEN , THE USS PRINCETON , USS NIMITZ, AND USS PELELIU .. I enjoyed my times on those ships.. The times we had were unforgettable.. and believe me I have many stories I could Tell or have told.. But like I said , we deserve the lifelong pension because .. we made sacrifices in our lives no one can fathom or understand . Just imagine 6-9 months on a ship with the same people eating the same food.. It can make you go crazy and at times we did, the arguments , the fist fights , the explosions of emotions were second to none , but despite it all we still loved one another and fought on..and now that I have been retired now.. for 5 years . its hard to believe.. Its over.. But I have to move on,,and start my new life as a father of two growing boys and a lovely wife who dealt with my shit and believe me ,, she is great to deal with me.. I know I'm Moody, selfish ,arrogant.. but that's what leading men under stressful times do.. I know ., if my shipmates seen me now,, they would think what happened. Because I don't give a shit what i say or do,, good or bad.. I don't care.. I mean I was brainwashed for 20 years to believe in things.. But now.. I say and do,.. things, that may hurt people. but its what a veteran does.. let things out , we have too.. That's why I enjoy my muscle car and my guns,, its a relief from the realities of life.. To us vets. we look to our hobbies to soothe our hearts and minds, where so many years of tears and fears affected our minds.. Maybe its therapy or what But like I said.. Having my toys with me,brings me more joy than being with my family? Weird.. yea we vets are.. We have been through so much to really explain our pains to our loved ones. That's why vets turn to other vets, .. for compassion.. Yea,, we deserve all the benefits we get because we have endured so many things many of you ,, civilians cant imagine.. The Military is a different world,, and to be honest I miss it.. But I also know I have to move on because that's What God wants.. so with that.. May God Bless America and the may men and women serving and May peace be with everyone,, because war is hell and hatred is a horrible thing to feel. Until my next blog.. Have a great day!!
THE SOURCE PRODUCTIONS @2017
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