TWIN FLAMES ? BASED ON LIFE EXPERIENCES..

TWIN FLAMES ? BASED ON LIFE EXPERIENCES ..

   First of all .  A twin flame relationship is a divine union with a divine purpose. Many people proscribe to the belief that a twin flame is the other half of your soul. I thought I found it what ? 3 times in my life... and it seems all three times.. It all crashed and burned,. Is it love? or just bull shit illusions woman or a man can do to another person. I mean when i felt like no other when I met my twin flames. We connected with everything we said and did. The connection was so close and special.. I mean the journals , the timeless talks about nothing is like no other , but like always in my life it seems it fades away,, Am i mad.. No not really just disillusioned with people .I mean people shouldn't play with peoples emotions,, But who am I to say that? I mean when i was hurt many years ago,, I went on a man whore rage,, Hurting every female I could connect with. Was it wrong,, Of course it was. Will I pay for it .. I think now , I am.. With the hardships and pain and misery I have felt in my life... From the child hood relations to have girls dump me , or cheat on me..Those thoughts or images never go away, I mean.. how can you trust anyone , when at a young age I was betrayed and lied to.. It seems the nice guys get screwed over or vice versa.. You open your heart and soul and trust your life of dreams and ideas with that person. Only to find out they are too scared to share the same ideas and thoughts with you.. Maybe a foolish heart or foolish man that trust people too much. Who knows if the pain and suffering I have gone through , the deaths in my whole family , from murder ,suicide , aids, you name it My family has seen the horrors of life,, and yet I continue to smile and spread my happiness to people.. When My mama died , that really changed me forever , I was angry , hurt , devastated , I felt the only person that loved me and understood was gone for forever.. I cant tell how many times I prayed to God to take me to my mama..I did reckless things after my mama passed. driving a cray speeds making dangerous moves.. I skidded off the free way once only to survive,, I nearly fell of the ship when dancing near the rails drunk as hell, I was hurt and still am. to be honest.. MY mama was my twin flame.. we thought alike, we acted alike , we loved people, with all our hearts..We didn't care if the love was returned,, We did things because we love people . Too see people smile and laugh was a gift . We wanted people to be happy. Despite the horrors and tragedies in our life.. We continue.. to smile and bring happiness to people. But it seems many people in our lives took us for granted , and treated us badly. If anything we were guilty of being caring in this world. We knew the world can be scary and cold and many people don't care. But my mama and I were like angels sent down to earth to bring joy and happiness.Even though we have been hurt and misunderstood, we kept our spirits up ..Its like a curse to be so loving , because people expect you to always be happy , no matter what.. Believe me it has happened a few times in my life where I wanted to be like everyone else. But because I'm perceived as the ultimate positive thinker.. Oh if you really knew me? I mean theres no one on earth that Can be happy all the time.. So why me? I mean .. I miss one day at work and people go crazy!! 
But who said life is fair. Some people are destined , ordained .. perhaps cursed with having that ability to make people smile and be happy. Its a tough responsibility , but I'm for it.. Its just very lonely to please everyone.. Because its false reality. But that's the life i live. I have to happy and jolly all the time.. I have to crack jokes, I have to sing and dance,, I'm the entertainer in my family , work , anywhere. I have the light that fire that never burns out.. Maybe you see that personality at work. where .. theres that one person that never seems to be affected by life, He or she is the light in the office or work place,, and everyone depends on that person to bring them out!!
   Now tothe  twin flame,,, they are supposed to be your mirror, but if one is loud and proud , the other side is shy , tentative , timid.. its the yin and yang perspective.. Its revolving its something that cosmic , spiritual to have found someone you connect on all levels. its the most amazing thing to feel if ever you find that person or persons.. But like anything in life,, everything can fade and dies.. I mean I feel Ike My life has died many times over knowing that the person I had connection with.. is gone, or given up on me? Its a tough realization to feel left out? To feel abandoned. I mean how can something feel so right , be so wrong? How can the love or respect or feelings we had , be turned off just like that. Is it jealousy ? Is it fear , is it betrayal. Whatever it is,. It makes me wonder if Love is really true. If its worth to take a chance just to be hurt.Its like,, whats worse than a broken heart , another one.. .. What happens if your heart is broken so many times.. It can be fixed.. Its so tattered and destroyed and that nothing can mend it.. Maybe it time for this dreamer , this broken hearted clown, to join the true angels in heaven , because the devils on earth , the demons continue tempt this angel.. Its like even an angle cant be attacked often and expect to survive without any help. Its like watching a animal being attacked by vultures and despite his efforts finally succumbs to the many devils or demons attacking him. Its the way I feel, the pain and suffering i have survived , has taken its toll on me.. I mean how many close friends have to die in my life ? How many shipmates have to take their lives because of survivor guilt,, Which I feel , because why didn't I die with them. Its  a guilt only a veteran of foreign wars can feel. I thank God I have special friends like Joe , and Tony , Colin , Annie and now LONG LOST BROTHER GREG.. AND JOJO.. with out them ,, What can a misery  would be drowning myself.. I mean I;m a very positive person.. But the pains and sorrows,, has taken its toll .. But with the Help of Prayers and my few true friends. I'm living life to the fullest and when its over .. All can I say is that I want people to remember Mel as that guy who had unconditional , respectful and undemanding love that is so rare in the world. I know i was different ever since I was young.. I knew my purpose was to bring peace , joy and happiness to those around me. By preaching and living that way. I know I affected , influenced people to follow my lead. Because My true flame is out there , and I will love you with unconditional love and respect and when we reunite ,, I know I will treat you like the queen you deserve .. Because its been so lonely without my flame.. But I will let time , go and let the destiny of our passions , come to realization.. They say if you let something go and they come back,, then its meant to be.. Sometimes we learn to miss someone , to wish for them .. long for them to really feel the love you have for them. So to my flame ., Lets the time pass and may we find ourselves and find true self realization.. Because that's what life is all about , finding oneself.. Once that happens you have found true happens.. and for many sometimes we never reach that point in our lives,. Because 'm not sure if I will face or realize my full potential, But as long as Live I'm going to give it my best shot. That is face up to my fears and insecurities and man up so to speak , because true self reflection occurs when you let ego , pride and neediness to the side and be one in yourself and find that inner peace we all aspire for.. May God be with you and thank you for your support. The source has 32000 hits since 2010,,
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