Made a cook cry?-manning the rails-

Made a cook cry ? -manning the rails- inspired story from some one I once knew...
 Ok, Once again I'm back on a ship, for those that have never been on a United States Navy ship , it basically sucks, it;s cold , and it can hot at times. You see the same old people , some you really can't stand. Imagine that , being with people , you can't stand and seeing them every freaking day. Because its a small boy= small ship , you see people at the galley, the ships store , passageways , no place to hide. So you know theirs always one or two guys that make ship life bearable.. You know the ones that crack jokes , the crazy guy who breaks tension with jokes and silly stories and comments/ Well guess what.?. yeah me! , that crazy guy who likes to break the tension regardless of the consequences or what..? ok enough of that.. right?
  This is my first west pac 1993.. and probably the Best cruise or at least one of the best ones I ever had in my career. But this one is special because it's my first west pac . Now we are returning after a long 6 month cruise to the gulf and other Asian countries.. Malaysia, Hong Kong . Australia , Hawaii to name a few stops on this pac.. Everyone is excited , and ready to see family members and the tradition is we all man the rails before pulling into port. Simple enough , so the announcement comes and of course Supply Dept musters us together.. Cool , right ? Well me, the shit talker and joker is set to make announcements or comments to my SK buddies , everyone wants to be near me,, right ..?
  yeah ok, as we pull into Puget Sound harbor , Washington state.. We are in our dress whites , like i said i ramblin about things , people laughing , then i see the Pier and on the Pier I see this big white balloon or I though it was. But it was a big ass fat lady , of course I'm ready to say something , like look " a blimp!" it;s grounded!:" This young girl is so fat she doesn't just sit down , she sits around.. making a gesture of a large person .. I'm on a roll, shes so fat when she goes to all you can eat place , she gets charged a group rate..haha group rate.. Shes so fat he cant tell shes wearing two different pairs of shoes.. haha.. Everyone is laughing except this young skinny white dude next to me,you know the type scared of their own shadow.. types,. ok I look towards him, everyone is laughing their asses off. The dude says " hey man , that's my wife!, and tears roll down his face because of the endless laughter ringing out.. What does this young jokester do ??
show mercy.. No .. Instead I say " dude i heard of a Mercy fuck , but a mercy marriage , cmon man..hahaha I hear about people liking or loving pork or pigs , but not enough to marry one.. haha.. I heard opposites attracts.. But this is not right.. Be careful in bed.. I heard of rolling over in bed, but in your case rolling over I'm dead.//haha.ok thats really mean. but sometimes the truth hurts and that's how I made a cook cry on the day we returned from wet pac 93. Lessons learned , if you have a fat wife or girlfriend , you better damn well not stand next to me.. Because you might not like what I have to say. ok until the next story..
THE SOURCE PRODUCTIONS @2011..